


Turnabout is Fair Play

by sunkelles



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Character Study, F/F, Femslash, I Don't Even Know, Implied Incest, Unreliable Narrator
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-25
Updated: 2014-04-25
Packaged: 2018-01-20 17:22:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1518911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunkelles/pseuds/sunkelles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Morgana’s change of heart and sides came only after they betrayed her. As they always say, turnabout is fair play.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Turnabout is Fair Play

**Author's Note:**

> This one just sort of happened and I posted it despite the poor quality. Please forgive me.

Morgana’s change of heart and change of sides was the result of many combined factors: her magic, her decaying relationship with Gwen, fear, Morgause, her personal convictions, and Merlin’s betrayal.

Morgana had held many people dear, but one by one, they all betrayed her trust.

They all hurt her.

Uther held more prejudice than love for her.

Arthur would see her on a pyre if Uther ordered it.

Merlin, the boy she considered a friend, tried to kill her.

And then there was Gwen, dear, sweet, _traitorous Gwen._ She and Gwen had been friends since they were children, and intimate since they were early teens. She trusted Gwen above all others, with her feelings, with her thoughts, and with her heart. Gwen was her _best friend._ Gwen was her love. And it wasn’t until the incident with the Griffon, with _Lancelot,_ that this really started to change. Lancelot was banished, and Gwen’s feelings seemed to die down, so she excused it. They went back to making love and their lingering touches and all was well. And Morgana told Gwen about her visions, and Gwen _believed her._ Gwen idn’t understand why Morgana couldn’t tell Uther, but she believed her. And then Gwen’s father died, and Morgana almost killed Uther for it. But she didn’t have the strength, and Gwen curled up into herself after that. Not visibly, really. But she was more cautious in everything, even their love making, which was decreasing in frequency.

But slowly, Gwen seemed to come back out of her shell, and that was something, really it was.

Until it wasn’t. Until the touches stopped and the loving looks decreased in frequency. Until Gwen started seeing Arthur behind her back. And Morgana discovered her own magic, and started living in fear- in fear of Uther. And of Arthur, who would stand by as his father executed her, of Gwen, who would choose Arthur over her.

And she supposes, that’s what sent her to Merlin about her magic instead of Gwen. Maybe it was spite, or maybe it was because Merlin was the first friend she had made since she met Gwen. And through the experience she realized that she wasn’t evil,  that she wasn’t a monster, but that’s about it. She wished that she would have realized more, that would have fled Camelot more quickly, gotten far from Uther’s hold- far from the people who would betray her.

Gwen and Arthur grew closer as Morgana and Gwen grew further. Morgana became determined not to tell Gwen of her magic, afraid that she would take the prince’s side over hers. Though she wanted the relationship back, she didn’t know how to go about it, and she was still bitter about Arthur.

_The one who did nothing as Gwen’s father died, while I would have killed Uther over it,_ Morgana thought bitterly. Morgana wasn’t even sure who she hated more over it, Arthur for stealing Gwen away from her, or Gwen for betraying her.

 

And then she met Morgause, whom she felt an instant connection to. Morgause, who soothed her dreams and made her feel adequate again, not second-best to Arthur, not evil, not a freak.

 

And she agreed to help take down Uther, not fully knowing what she was assenting to. But she wouldn’t take it back, because Merlin tried to kill her, because Merlin, who she trusted- who she trusted with her life tried to take it from her. After that she knew where his loyalties lie. She should have known that he would choose Arthur over her, why wouldn’t he? Even Gwen had.

 

It was a slow process, really, her transition from loving to bitter, until it wasn’t. Before that, she had resented Arthur, had been angered by Gwen’s change of heart, but Merlin’s betrayal sent her over the edge; Morgause's love kept her there. 

 

Morgause saved her from the fate Merlin would have left her to. Morgause was kind to her. Morgause was like her- a sister in more ways than one. Morgause was a teacher, a friend, a hand to hold in her darkening landscape, and a shoulder to cry on. Sometimes she was a lover as well. 

 

And who could truly blame her for choosing Morgause? Over the king who would burn her for who she was and the near-brother who would stand there and watch. Over one of the first people she had ever called a friend, who had tried to kill her. Over her adulterous best friend and lover?

 

Oh no. Morgause would see her queen. Morgause would see her use her magic to her full potential. And Morgana would be a powerful sorceress, and she would be queen. And most of all, Morgana would make them all _pay._ Morgause would help her see to that, because Morgause loved her.

 

Moraguse loved her, and that was more than could be said for anyone else.

 

 


End file.
